Who's in control of who?

With Valentine’s Day around the corner…I feel one of the most important qualities in a relationship with your partner is to accept the decisions they make and to support them in those decisions. That is without saying anything to the contrary! Easy? Are you kidding me! It has to be one of the toughest things for me to overcome. I’m not only talking about my husband, I’m talking about the majority of my relationships with people. In looking back, anytime I’ve ‘reacted’ to their decisions in the past, it hasn’t been a good experience. It almost felt like I wished I wouldn’t have said anything.

‘Reacting’ shows up when you try to talk them out of their decision for some reason. It can come from thinking you know what would be better than they do. It can come from those times where you thought you were smarter or it can go deep down to where you wanted them to do what you wanted them to do (maybe be with you instead of going out with their friends). Talk about controlling issues. I know I’ve come from all those places at one time or another. It truly has been my reaction that showed me my lessons. If I don’t get it the first time, it shows up again. The Universe is so good about making sure I get it one of these times.

Almost every time I’ve reacted to some of the decisions my husband has made, I’ve come to a place of seeing how what I did was wrong (if I could use that word); how what I did was not called for. One time he made plans to do some building in the garage. I talked him out of it so we could be together that night. He changed his plans and what ended up happening was I got a call to do some energy work on someone who needed it that night. If I would have accepted my husband’s decision to work in the garage, and supported him, we would have both been in a place to do what we were both called to do that night.

The other side of that is true as well. My husband made plans to do some building and I was at peace with those plans. I knew we would be together later. What happened was his plans changed and I got to be with him the whole night.

When we get ourselves out of the way allowing life to flow, it does so for the highest good of the whole involved. We don’t see what is planned for us or the others in our life for that matter. Are you okay with that? Who’s in control of who?